“My story with endometriosis didn’t start when I was diagnosed…it started when I was 12.
I remember my first period so clearly because of the pain. It was overwhelming, confusing, and scary, but I told myself it must be normal. Everyone talks about period pain like it’s something you just deal with, so I did. I stayed quiet and pushed through, not realising that what I was feeling wasn’t normal at all.
By the time I was 16, I knew something wasn’t right. That’s when I started fighting for answers. But instead of being heard, I was dismissed. I was told it was all in my head. I was told there was nothing wrong with me. I was even told to “just get pregnant” as if that was a solution.
I was referred to the gynaecology department 12 different times—and every single time, I was dismissed.
The pain didn’t stop. It got worse. There were months where I was in the emergency department 3–4 times, just trying to manage it. In 2024 alone, I was admitted to hospital 22 times because the pain was so severe. Imagine having to fight that hard just to be taken seriously.
Then I finally found a GP who listened. Someone who didn’t brush me off, who believed me, and who actually wanted to help. That changed everything.
In November 2024, I had an ultrasound that first suggested endometriosis. Then in April 2025, I was admitted to hospital and had an MRI that finally gave me answers: stage 3 endometriosis, adenomyosis, and retrograde menstruation.
After years of fighting, I finally had proof.
I was placed on the public waiting list for surgery and waited five long months, holding onto hope that things might finally get better.
But when I went in for surgery, everything changed again.
Within half an hour of being in theatre, they opened me up and then closed me again. When I woke up, the first thing I asked was, “Did you get it?”
And the answer broke me.
It was too extensive.
I was told I actually had stage 4 endometriosis, including thoracic endometriosis, with the worst diaphragm involvement they had ever seen. I cried hearing those words—after everything, it still wasn’t over.
Endometriosis has taken over my body. My ovaries are glued to my uterus. My bowel is stuck to my uterus. On my right side, everything is affected—all the way up to my lungs. It’s hard to even put into words what that feels like to hear.
Since then, I’ve been referred to Christchurch Hospital, and now I’m waiting for another surgery—another chance at relief.
At the beginning of 2025, I had to make the difficult decision to leave my job because the pain became too much. That wasn’t easy, but I was lucky to have a boss who supported me through everything. That experience reminded me that even in the hardest moments, there are still good people who care and stand by you.
And through all of this, my partner has been there. He walked into this mess and never once stepped away. He stayed by my side through every hospital visit, every setback, every moment I felt like giving up. When I couldn’t advocate for myself, he did it for me. When I had to make the decision to leave work, he supported me without hesitation. Having someone stand beside you like that—it means everything.
My family has also been my foundation through all of this. They’ve given me constant love, words of encouragement, and the strength to keep going when I felt like I had nothing left. They’ve checked in on me, sat with me on my hardest days, and been the shoulder I’ve cried on more times than I can count. They never gave up on me—even when the system did. And seeing me finally get answers after years of fighting a broken health system has meant just as much to them as it has to me.
This journey has taken so much from me—physically, emotionally, mentally. But it has also shown me something I never expected: my own strength.
Because even after years of being dismissed, even after the pain, the hospital visits, the heartbreak, and the setbacks—I’m still here. I’m still fighting.
Never back down. You will get your answers.
My mum has always said something that’s stuck with me through all of this: “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.” And she’s right. Keep pushing. Keep speaking up. Keep advocating for yourself until someone listens—because eventually, someone will.
And don’t do it alone. Lean on your people—your family, your friends, your partner—the ones who show up for you on your hardest days. Support systems matter more than words can explain.
If my story shows anything, it’s this:
You know your body. You deserve to be heard. And no matter how long it takes, don’t stop fighting.
Because your pain is real—and your story matters.”
We thank Abbey for bravely sharing her endometriosis story with us and helping continue to shine a light on the impact of endometriosis. Since sharing her story, Abbey has two upcoming surgeries scheduled in Aotearoa.